let me help you say “no”

So you’re talking to someone who is transitioning between jobs (or thinking about it), and yet they still brush off your profession that you know to be a perfect match for all their wants and needs! They are ready for you with ALL of only two excuses….

1. Time, “not enough as it is”
2. Location, “could be moving within the year”

So you ask your friend, “Is there anything else?”


— — — — — — — —

The business of Network Marketing is all about TIME LEVERAGE working from ANY LOCATION!!

Which means that when you are offered a solution to what you want to change, don’t stall out your vehicle or hand the keys over to fear!

“Fear is lousy with directions.”
–Care’n Boyer Smith–

The only excuse is the one we make up! The lie.

And, as a professional, you already know excuses are a desperation, that only leads to the next lie!

Of course they don’t have the time! That’s why you’re talking to them now so they can experience what leveraging time freedom looks like! What you offer is merely another option they might be open to, like you were!

Don’t buy into lies. It’s creepy.

It feels creepy for the person rambling too!

Instead, let’s help our prospect take the opportunity to be honest with us and themselves, as in this case, the overwhelming concern for ailing parents.

Sometimes “no, thank you” is a great decision!

It’s okay to say “no”!

don’t talk your prospect out of it!

Imagine this is your year! You’ve been patient and now finally here you are at the biggest, best Outdoor Living Store and you know exactly what you want!

Hot Tub!

That’s the one! Round and rugged like the tall wooden water towers you’ve seen in the old western movies, sized for 8 people comfortably, and just the right amount of water jets in all the right places. Without a doubt THIS IS THE ONE!

The helpful clerk holds the ladder for you to get inside and take a joy ride in the showroom tub. You’re only question as you sit there dreaming is, “Can I use salt water instead of chlorine, like the new swimming pools!?”

The reply? “Salt water is only good for swimming pools…. blah blah blah blah”. Seeing my smile get bigger, he continues, “Well, think about it! Can you imagine all the bacteria off people sweating in 104 degree water?”

— — — — — — — —

I no longer fantasize of my Hot Tub.

Nor, do I own one!

what does your prospect have in common with a toad?

Imagine that you’re in your garden primed and ready to enjoy the first rewards of Spring!! It had been a harsh winter!

You’ve made the trip to town and return with a trunk full of bold fragrant blooms, hand trowel, and garden gloves in your grasp ready for action.

A wheel-barrel would sure be helpful and on your innocent stroll to retrieve it,…… Dun! dun! dun!…… dramatic music!

Paralyzing fear takes over! Where did HE come from?! You’re heart races,  “I’m not prepared for this! I didn’t expect to run into anyone! Run and maybe he won’t notice me!”

— — — — — — — —

That was me this morning! And HE was my greatest fear, a Toad!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Is that how you feel when you run into someone you weren’t expecting to help? Even though we know everyone has their role and purpose! What if God choreographed you together because you need each other? That would sure be a tragic loss to run, yes??!

toad  [tōd]  :  an adorable creature
with bumpy skin, short legs, no teeth…

How about that?!!  They don’t bite!!

why the brand “iced tea talks”

Because I don’t do beer!

AND the fact that “Iced Tea” is my comfort food.

As  a little girl, dad would pull into the driveway from work each day at 5:10pm. That’s when I would run down to the car with a tall glass of tea with way too much ice that I had shaken inverted inside another glass to make sure every ice-cube had dispersed its maximum chill factor. What is Iced Tea if not cold, right?!

In fact it was so important, I would risk my life to fetch fresh mint for this beverage of choice. Okay, well, when you’re a little kid walking the creek full of snapping turtles and crawfish and worst of all, FROGS! Just sayin’!

So I’d reach to my father that glass brimming with aerated froth and fresh mint. And with the first sip, his lips would smack with that delighted approval sound just before an exhale…… “Ahhhhh”! That’s all he said.

Dad is how I learned to not waste words.

Listen. Mostly listen.

With that “Ahhhhh”, I hear,….

Daughter I love you more than spoken word. There aren’t enough words in ANY language to say how I feel knowing you are scared gathering mint alone without me here to protect you, because you want so to share your heart celebrate every time I come back home to you safe. I well up with pride watching your committed spirit learn how to prepare such a fine feast for me to enjoy, and I do, because your precious hands prepared every detail as no one else knows how.”

Yep, that’s what I heard. And perhaps that’s why it was rare to hear Father’s voice growing up. He would have exhausted himself with how much he wanted to say!

I love you too!

give more, get more

When I was a little girl, perhaps kindergarten, mother dropped us off at a neighbor while mother ran errands in town. There were other children there and it would be a fun play day.

Before mother rushed off pulling out of the driveway, through the passenger side window she handed me a small white paper bag with 7 chocolates to pass around to everyone.

I was raised with good manners and respect and immediately ran up the cement front porch steps eager to offer our hostess the first piece.

Making my way to the backyard, I gave each of the other children their candy too.

And then there were none. The bag was empty and I already gave mine away. Mother had brought enough candy for only the children.

When the babysitter saw from her kitchen window that I was the only child not eating, she promptly made a fuss and a whole batch of chocolate brownies!

Now, while this memory pulls at my heart-strings for the sweet child, I don’t remember being traumatized…. until the grownup made such a fuss that it wasn’t right!!

So it was wrong?! I was wrong?! I am bad?

— — — — — — — —

Today fifty years later, I am the one to bring treats!

The treats I gave today were homemade and hand-rolled oversized pretzels with that glorious caramelized chew crust and soft center fresh from my 450° oven all warm and aromatic. Nothing but love over 36-hours to prep, rise, and bake. I delivered them to people who serve our community; our fire chief, police chief, and postmaster.

What I just now came home to, is a kitchen that smells as fine as a fresh hot pretzel artisan bakery. And not one morsel saved behind for me.



Today’s experience is that giving away what makes you happy can only create more happy!!  The recipe for pretzels can be repeated. And you can be sure I can’t wait to give those away too!

The most filling thing to give yourself are the faces that light up because, today, you chose to show up!

Show up!

an·ger [ˈaNGɡər] NOUN, a strong feeling while losing your argument with reality


Through the pitch-black night, the captain sees a light dead ahead on a collision course with his ship.

He sends a signal: “Change your course ten degrees east.”

The light signals back: “Change yours, ten degrees west.” 

Angry, the captain sends: “I’m a Navy captain! Change your course, sir!”

“I’m a seaman, second class”, comes the reply. “Change your course, sir.”

Now the captain is furious. “I’m a battleship! I’m not changing course!”

There’s one last reply. “I’m a lighthouse. Your call.”

a story of forgiveness

For 9-months I had been obsessed to take my own life.

Until shortly after my 25th birthday when a half dozen of us from my Squadron were sent on a brief NATO assignment. I asked permission to stay behind at Kaufbeuren Air Base.

With that permission, I made my way into Germany alone, knowing nothing of the language or the grid, for the sole purpose to face the man whose words violated me; completely altering my life story.

How I hated him for his acts that changed the course of everything I thought I knew. My depression escalated all-consuming out of control.

Because of hate.

And it was for THAT reason, my heart knew it needed to ask for his forgiveness.

So there I was alone and in Germany, the entire journey before, during, after, intense. Walking up the hill in the churchyard toward a man I never met, he looked straight at me speaking, “I know who you are”.

We continued up the hill together as he walked me to his office where my first suffering words were, “Please forgive me….”

We were both startled by the sounds of my voice and, in peripheral vision, mountains moved!

He also asked for forgiveness. And we held onto each other, as Christ would. Feels as clear as today.

That same Sunday I stepped forward in his church to be baptized by him, the pastor.

It was Palm Sunday. A time of resurrection.

That is the last time I hated anyone. And also the reason why not!


— — — — — — — —

When I returned home, I asked mother’s permission to change my name to reflect the bedtime story she told us growing up with the moral, “If you’re Share’n and Care’n, you’ll have a Rich and fulfilling life”…. reflecting the names of her three children.

It saddens when folks make light of my name as a trivial nickname for my work.

My decision was to honor my mother’s legacy, and her foresight. It is the cross I carry reminding ME that life would never be the same.

Who do you need to forgive to rise again?! Could it be yourself?